Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Entering the Peculiar Zone

There is this place on my bike commute where that’s kind of like the twilight zone. Well, I guess not exactly like the twilight zone, but it is definitely the peculiar zone.

It’s this stretch of Veterans Memorial Parkway between Chinden and the Boise River. I know, it is in Garden City, which probably explains most of the peculiarity – but still.

One dark morning a few years ago I am riding on the sidewalk over the bridge and someone turns onto the sidewalk off the greenbelt on the other side – coming towards me. They have the mother of all headlights. Between squints and expletives I am thinking ‘I gotta get me one of those’! It was like a freaking car headlight – turns out it was a lot like a car headlight. It was a motorcycle. With a Garden City Cop on it. Glad I didn’t flip the bird. This place is so weird event he Garden City cops patrol it.

This is also the same spot where I saw ‘bike surfing guy’…

So last week I am riding home through the peculiar zone. Crossing the bridge and ‘bmx guy’ is coming right at me. Having been here before I realized what was happening. You see, there is this jersey barrier between the sidewalk and the actual traffic lanes. At the terminus of the jersey barriers there is this sloping, ramping, barrier thingy. It’s begging for anybody on a bike to ride up it and balance your way across the bridge – death by traffic on one side, pain and embarrassment on the other side. The sloping, ramping, barrier thingy is so inviting that I have almost been sucked into its vortex many times.


Anyhow, I see the glassy look on bmx guys face and know he is going for it. Not one to stand in the way of certain death or painful embarrassment I cross to the other side of the path to give him room. As chance would have it I didn’t see the crash.


Just after I passed I hear a crunching grinding bmx on concrete sound. When I glance back the bike is straddling the barrier and bmx guy has one leg up in the air tangled with the bike and the other leg hopping around on the ground for balance. Lucky bastard – painful embaressment.
This morning in about the same place there is a dude riding right at me. I know he isn’t lining up for the sloping, ramping, barrier thingy – because he is going the wrong way and I already passed that. Nope, this guy is going for a little early morning bike chicken. My headlight is working (I looked), I know he can see me – got to be bike chicken. Doesn’t this guy know who I am? I’m ANGRY. I’m THE ANGRY Cyclist!


Getting closer, can see a bit better now. It’s DUI guy. He isn’t moving over. There is a jersey barrier to my left, ugly Iron railing and river to the right. The path is probably 8 ft wide there, plenty of room to pass even if the dude is riding in the middle.
Rather than move right the dude moves left a little bit. Still room on either side. I’m ANGRY! I aim right at him.


Getting closer…


I put my best disinterested look on my face. Getting closer. Real close.
DUI guy moves right a bit. He’s getting nervous. I move left a bit, I’m ANGRY!

At the last second DUI guys veers right.

My super huge commuting bag brushes his super huge poofy DUI guy coat at we pass…

Another experience in the peculiar zone.

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