Because what 6 year old doesn’t like a good robot right?
So most of the art is paintings and photos of what people perceived robots to look like in about 1940 or something. You know, back before we figured out that robots don’t need to look like humans to do human jobs…
And that, in fact, most of the time you can do jobs better if you are not shaped like a human.
So yeah, anyway, representations of big blocky things that shuffle around when they talk they sound like Tiger Woods reading a press announcement. "I AM A ROBOT..."
I gotta say, I was a little disappointed. I didn’t see Twiki anywhere.
You know, bdbdbdbdbdbd, from Buck Rogers? The comic little robot that rocked the smart little robot around on a chain around his neck like Flava Flav rocks that big ass clock? The one with vacuum cleaner hoses for legs? No? This one…
Yeah, Twiki. He was the best robot ever. The smart robot was an asshole. How smart was he if he had to be lugged around by Twiki – jeesh, mix in a body dude.
Isn’t it funny that people in the 80’s thought that in the future people would rock shiny spandex around in public – when the only people that ever do that are people in the 80’s. And bike riders.
I started to realize that I just don’t get it when I saw a painting on the wall. It had the word ‘Robot’. Only it was in gothic font. Whoa. Not like, well, Microsoft Word could pull that one off. So I read the little plaque on the wall that tells me what I am supposed to think. Apparently it is supposed to make me reflect on Frankenstein.
Umm, dude? I read that book. Frankenstein wasn’t a robot – just bits of dead guy all lumped together and then lit up until it ran away. Oh yeah, I think he killed some people in there too.
Disappointed. No Twiki. The word Robot framed. I just don’t get it. Maybe I am not cultured as hell after all.
I knew I didn’t get it when I went in the next room where there were several water color accidents, err, pieces of art. My favorite was the white paper with the blue mark in the middle. The mark that looked like someone accidentally lay their brush down on the paper when they went to take a leak and when they came back there was an unfortunate blue mark on the paper from the paint and water that was on the brush. Yeah I liked that one. And the ones on the notebook paper that looked like someone had accidentally done the same thing (left the brush sitting there) several times with different colors. It was five ring notebook paper though. I mean, you don’t see that stuff every day.
You know what else I don’t get?
Ice dancing. Is that like figure skating for people that weren’t quite good enough to compete but were too good to quit? I mean, I am already a bit skeptical about pairs figure skating. Part of me thinks that pairs skating is only for people who weren’t quite good enough to compete individually.
So you take that (pairs figure skating), you take out all the hard stuff - you throw in some ridiculous costumes and some music with words – and you have a new sport. Well kind of.
It’s like rhythmic gymnastics. Mix in some ribbon and maybe no one will notice that you aren’t as good as the other gymnasts.
At least they look and train like athletes. I saw the bobsled racing too. The Olympic equivalent of NASCAR. I am pretty sure the driver of USA1 snuck in when The Biggest Loser visited the Olympic Training Center in last weeks episode. I am almost positive it is the dude from the red team. You know, the one with the mental wife.
Yeah, I’m like, ‘holy crap’ there’s the red team guy driving the bobsled! No really, I was. Couldn’t they just let that guy sit in the sled so we don’t have to watch him run in spandex. Maybe they could have like a pinch runner or something. That made me proud to be American.
Yeah, things like that are the reason that people in the future won’t just rock around in public wearing shiny spandex.
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