How to Kill a Squirrel…

Went multi-training again last night. We tried something new. Instead of the ‘horse race’ screen we watched a video of riders on a training ride. The resistance of the trainers is correlated with the intensity of the ride on the screen. The biggest difference was that you could not see your performance relative to your neighbors, hence less competition and less suffering. I actually think that I prefer the suffering.

So while riding along (virtually of course) in the front of the pack a squirrel shoots out from the far side of the road but locks up its breaks right before slamming into the front wheel of the lead rider. I looked over my shoulder to see if anyone else got it, but all I saw were a couple sets of rollers and an exercise ball. I guess I didn’t see a disclaimer that ‘no animals were harmed’ hmmm?

Snow, Ice, and Running Suck

Been a snowy, icy week here in good old Boise, so I decided to break out the running shoes and do a little cross training. All was good for the first few days, but after day 5 the ankle was hurting bad enough that I had to stop running.

Yup I am crippled for a while. Good times.

Santa – The Ass Hole

I had my second ‘nice guy’ infraction on my commute yesterday morning. It was a bad idea to ride when it was 12 degrees anyway – I should have seen it coming.

I was within a mile of the end of my 12 mile commute when I saw the first bike approaching the other way. It was a guy I have seen many times before on my morning commute. He is a little big, older, with a big white beard and mustache.

I have never had a problem with the guy before, but yesterday he swerved towards me at the last second for no apparent reason. I nearly went of the path avoiding him. Then the involuntary reaction came ‘WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOING ASS HOLE!!!!!!’

I think I called Santa an ass hole. Oh well, Christmas is over-rated anyway. Chalk that guy up on my list of cycling enemies.

First Bird of the Year

I made it 12 days. Twelve long days before the first bird of the year flew.

I was riding home from work on Friday when I passed Matrix guy and his friend D&D kid walking on the greenbelt. I knew it was them because of the long black trench coats, the round glasses, and the greasy hair – wait maybe it was Harry Potter.

When I went past they made some snide and sarcastic remarks like ‘Ride! Ride! Ride!’. My right hand involuntarily dropped off the bar, moved back by the messenger bag, and the bird flew the coup. Free at last. I really didn’t do it on purpose – it just happened.

I have been trying to cut back – really. I am afraid that one day the little bird will get me killed, so I have been biting my tongue and keeping my hands where they belong. Or at least trying too. I especially try not to let people know how I feel while riding in my team kit (this bird is brought to you by ______). My birds probably don’t need sponsors, and my sponsors probably don’t need birds.

Oh well, keep on trying. At least I haven’t flown the double eagle yet!

Swisher Sweets and The Walk of Shame

It didn’t look icy when I left for my bike commute this morning. Sure the ground was shiny here and there, but it looks like that when it’s wet too. Besides, the weatherman said that it would only get down to 34 degrees – that bitch.

I was about a mile out before I really started sliding the first time. “Way too far to turn back now”, I thought. I white knuckled it 6 miles to the greenbelt, I thought that at least if I fell on the greenbelt I wouldn’t get run over by a truck. I wonder if your heart racing in fear counts as zone 3 training?

It could have been worse, I was even nice enough to say ‘hi’ to school bus kid and his friends. As I slid on by the aroma of swisher sweet filled the air and all the kids tried to look innocent. Ah, the good old days minor consumption. Toke on dudes, I am neither your parents or a cop – and won’t pretend to be either.

As I reveled in the memories that the swisher sweet smell evoked, I rolled on to the greenbelt in Garden City. The greenbelt that has not been plowed or otherwise maintained for months. I got about a mile before I reached a section of snow/ice rut hell that apparently had been soft at one time but wasn’t now. I rode through it as well as I could until I took the first spill. Then I began the walk of shame. How humiliating to have to get off and walk the bike… January sucks.

Multi-trainer Hell

Multi-trainer Hell

Over the weekend I had my first experience with the multi-trainer. It was hell. The LAC team got together at the Endurance Training Center and rode for a few hours. Everyone lined up on the trainers and locked on to the little bars that represented them on the screen.

It was a lot like that game at the fair where you roll the ball into the little holes and the little horse scoots along the track. It was a lot like that, except without balls, little holes, and horses – but with a lot more pain.

So anyway I learned that I am fat and out of shape compared to my teammates. Go figure. Time to start training.

Also managed to get a flat on the trainer. WTF! Who gets a flat on a trainer. Apparently me. Looked like more pieces of staple that I ran over the other day. Nice. 2 flats in 5 days. Eff.

Tight Fitting Jeans and Other Winter Pleasures

Keeping the streak alive – I have ridden every day in 2008! All three of them.

It was a cold commute again today – the weatherman said it would be warmer – damn him. The packed snow and ice refuses to melt in some places on the road making my commute about 12 miles of dirty brown asphalt and ½ mile of snow/ice hell each way. I just love skidding across snow and ice from rut to rut, willing your way towards dry patches where it might be safe to make course corrections. I’m starting to wonder if maybe 23mm road bike tires were made for winter in Idaho at all?

Had another pleasant surprise this morning when I pulled on my jeans and they were a little snug in the hips. Hmmm, must have shrunk – it’s ok, I have ridden three days in a row now. Weight will start melting away any time now…

Happy Freak'n New Year

Yep, it’s a new year. All I got for New Years was a head cold and a flat rear tire on my bike.

The new year dawned flemmy and cold at the Elmer house yesterday. I forced myself to ride for an hour and a half through a drug induced (cold meds) haze and 20 degree temps. It was all good (everything is all good with enough medication) until I noticed that it was getting harder to pedal a couple miles from home. I had to execute the ‘pump and run’ until I got home as it was much to cold to fix a flat tire.

I resolved to have more fun this year. I tried goals last year, but they weren’t much fun. So this year – more fun, less goals.