Losing Battles

I took my son skiing for the last time last Friday. I mean for the last time this year, not the last time ever. Well, maybe not ever. I mean, I may need to rethink that.

I have been very careful about teaching my son to ski. I picked all the days when I knew that the weather and snow would be the most conducive to him enjoying the sport. You know, I don’t want to take my six year old out in a blizzard at 6 below and tell him he is having a good time. I figure that he needs to figure out that you can have fun in a blizzard at 6 below by himself.

I only take him as long as he wants to go, don’t force him to ski places he doesn’t want to, and make sure that we spend plenty of time in the lodge eating French fries. So yeah, I have gone through all this effort to make sure he likes it – and it has been working, he really likes skiing.

Well Friday the light really went on. He really loves skiing now. I wish I could say that it was something I said or did, but it wasn’t – it was something someone else said.

So there we are, skiing along. My son passes me. I think, that’s ok - he knows what he is doing.

Yup, he knows what he’s doing alright – he’s heading right towards some snowboarder doing the praying snowboarder thing. You know, the thing where they sit on their knees in the middle of the run and look back up the hill? Knuckle draggers.

So my son is closing on the kid. I’m thinking ‘this won’t end well’. The snowboarder is probably thinking about really starting to pray. At the last second my son turns hard right to avoid the kid.

I’m like ‘Whoa!’ Because, you know, it was a nice turn. I didn’t know he could do that!

The snowboarder was like ‘Whoa!!’ more in a 'holy shit that kid is going to hit me' kind of way.

Well my son hears ‘whoa!!’ in a 'that kid totally rocks' kind of way.

I knew I had my hands full as my son continued ripping down the hill laughing.

Yeah, so he spent the rest of the day pretty much using people as slalom poles. He didn’t hit anyone. Ran over some skis, but no people.

Every time we are going up the chair I explain to him how he needs to turn more and give people more space, he says ‘yeah ok dad’ and then disregards it.

I don’t want to be mean about it, because, you know, he is having a great time – but this is a safety issue right? I mean, I don’t know if I am covered by that disclaimer on the back of the pass. So one time up the chair I am a little more serious…

Me - ‘Little dude, you really need to slow down, turn more, and give the other skiers more space – I’m getting a bit ticked off’

Little Dude – ‘Dad, we need to join the battle for childrens rights’

Me – ‘Uh, that means you’re not going to turn doesn’t it.’

Little Dude – ‘Yeah dad, I’m not turning’

Right. That went well. Out-foxed by the six year old again. I am not smarter than a first grader. I shouldn’t let him read so much.

Later at home I am telling his mom about what he said…

Me – ‘Yeah, he said we need to join the battle for childrens rights’

Wife – ‘Um, he said what?’
Little Dude (disembodied voice from the other room) – ‘Yeah, I’m not letting my fear control me any more!’

Great. A six year old without fear and the battle for childrens rights behind him.