My Summer Vacation: Part 1.

So there I was, almost asleep, when I hear someone running down the hallway of the hotel yelling ‘Fire! Fire! Fire!’ I’m laying there thinking, Seriously? There can’t seriously be someone running down the hall yelling fire at 11 p.m.

It had been a long day already. The family and I took a little roadie from Boise to the Oregon coast. Its not really that far, but liberal Oregon has this conservative speed limit, and they strictly enforce it – especially for out of staters. Ugh. Its one thing to have a speed limit 10 mph lower than the surrounding states, but it’s a whole other thing to actually enforce it. I mean really, in Idaho the speed limit is 75 on the interstate. You have to go 85 before a cop even notices you. More like almost 90 to actually get pulled over. Oregon has a speed limit of 65 and you have to go about 68 before you get pulled over and get a ticket.

So yeah, anyway I was a little tense when we rolled into Newport. It made me want to run around yelling Fire! Fire! Fire! So when I heard the person running up and down the hall yelling I thought I knew why – just releasing tension right? I was pretty sure I was going to have to kill them anyway.

So while I was laying there contemplating all that, the person makes the return trip running and yelling FIRE! I’m thinking ‘wow, that person is really wound up!’

The third trip down the hall the person actually knocked on all the doors and said something about evacuating and not using the elevators. I thought that was a nice touch – I mean, I wouldn’t have thought of that. Impressed as I was, I was just as pissed off – because you know, I was almost asleep – just right there, I could taste it. Alas, to have it yanked away by some joker.

It was about then that the fire alarm went off. While I was pretty sure I could sleep through the person yelling if I tried hard enough, I was equally sure that I couldn’t sleep through the fire alarm.

I was also starting to think they meant it.

So the wife and I get out of bed. Running outside in my underwear would be unsavory so I threw on some clothes. I grab my computer in one arm and my still sleeping son in the other. You know, God save the internet. I’m wondering how long the hotel wireless will work while the hotel is burning down.

Anyhow my wife grabs some stuff and we head out with all the confused people. Everyone rushes to safety right outside the hotel door.

If you haven’t been to the Oregon coast it is kind of cold and breezy. Especially when your fly is unzipped. Nice, I didn’t burn up but I did show my bits to everyone.

Right, well we go sit in the car. There are two fire trucks with dudes putting on their oxygen tanks and grabbing equipment. Then the third truck pulled up. And then the ladder truck. Until that point I was pretty sure the hotel would not burn down because that only happens on tv. But the ladder truck – that’s serious shit right?

I was glad I left the camera in the car – I was going to get some great footage.
The dude in the car next to us whipped out his laptop and was testing to see how long the wireless would work.

After a while all the firemen came out all dejected like and started putting their gear away. They let everyone go back in.

Excellent way to start off a relaxing vacation…